Things I Love (January Edition)
Rethinking everything, finding vision, routines, and simple joys
Hey friends,
It has been a busy week (as all weeks are) here, but I have loved it because we have been snapping our lives back into routine. This has come after a month of sicknesses and holidays, and I feel such relief, because one of the things I love most in life is:
Having a Normal Week:
No one is throwing up, no unexpected emergencies, no fevers, no excessive drama, no extra trips that take over the whole day and more days to recover. We have been home, having normal days, getting back into the swing of things. I love being home. I love normal life.
More Things I’m Loving Right Now:
Evaluating Life and Re-Ordering It (Rethinking Everything):
I feel great relief when I have time to reflect on what is working and what isn’t, praying over it, brainstorming new ways to make life run more smoothly in this house. With 8 children, ages 16, 14, 12, 10, 8, 7, 4, and 2, this has been one of the constants of my life. Trying to figure this puzzle out, over and over again. I have learned that there is no one solution to parenting or homeschool that will carry me through every single season with every child. Each child is unique in the world, with different needs and desires, and our rhythms and ways of being as a family are constantly changing and fluctuating. So faith and flexibility are the main muscles I flex as a mother. “God, show me how to make life work in this season. God, teach us the things we need to know today. God, give me vision for how to move forward at this moment. God, show me where we need to focus our time and energy in the weeks ahead. God, how can I help these kids become the people you have created them to be? God, how can I make life work?”
Routine:
Our go-to routine, which we have been reestablishing this week, (and which will no doubt be turned up on its end in a couple of months when we welcome a new baby,) makes me really happy. My goal is to have three “typical” school days, where we sit at the table together for an extended time after breakfast, learning together. This starts with Randy reading the Bible, and then we move into some read-alouds. During this time, the kids are mostly drawing in sketchbooks or painting. I pulled out some special toys for the 2 and 4 year olds one day, which gave us a little more focused time at the table. After reading/discussion, we do a quick creative writing assignment, and then I send everybody on their way with the day’s schoolwork/housework listed for them. I spend time reading with my younger children, and sometimes schedule in some time where the younger kids are paired up as buddies with an older sibling. (They love this.) All of this takes us into early afternoon. Then we have quiet time (I have a nap), and in the afternoon on these three days, Randy and I tag-team teaching music lessons to our weekly students. (We are music teachers on the side—Randy teaches guitar, bass, and Irish whistle. I teach piano.)This sometimes includes visiting with friends who come weekly while siblings take lessons. Then it’s dinner and clean-up, and I’m soooooo proud of all we accomplished and go to bed happy and exhuasted. One day a week is set aside for creative work. This looks different every week, but as a woman who has had to learn to find ways and time to work out her creative life within the confines of motherhood, I see the need to give my children lots of time to pursue their creative interests. Sometimes this looks like play, especially in the younger children. Building, make-believe, making up games, etc. Sometimes it is watercolor or sewing, brainstorming, designing games or writing stories, recording music, baking, etc. I don’t put a lot of rules into this day, but try to allow my kids to learn and create in an organic and natural way. We all look forward to this. And then one day a week, we try to get the house in order and I do the grocery planning/shopping. We have one day that we try to observe a Sabbath of sorts, planning things ahead so that there is less work and more rest, and some time to seek God with a little more intention and focus. Mixed into the week is also church, youth group, book club, some OT visits, and a weekly game night with friends here at our house. Every day is busy in its own way, but the busy changes. And there is enough variety that none of the days feel totally overwhelming, even with my low energy and need for daily rest. It doesn’t always run smoothly, but I have found that in the last couple of years, this has been the best schedule for our needs as a creative family with many children.
Meal Plans:
I have never been great at these, but this is my second week of really sitting down, asking the kids for input as to what they want to eat, and spending a couple of hours making a master meal-plan for the week. My goal is to get one really good menu that we can reuse every week for a month, and have the oldest 5 kids learn to make one meal each week. This way, by the time the baby is here, I will be able to catch a little bit of a break. I made my plan this morning, and then ordered all my groceries for delivery. In the end, I saved time (and money) by not going to the store. And knowing that I have meals planned and all the food in the fridge and pantry is exquisite relief. Meals are such a huge part of my job in this life. Not knowing what we are going to eat is exhausting. Making a plan is making me feel happy and sane.
Pressure Cooker Meals:
I love my electric pressure cooker. I feel like I have the perfect slogan for the Instant Pot. I said it, actually, in a real conversation one night. Someone asked me what I was making for dinner, and I said, “I have no idea. But I know I have time to make it!” My pressure cooker died, and I bought a new (large-capacity) one with birthday money from my family. I have had it three days, and I’m soooo happy! I’ve decided I’m going to keep a page in my journal of all the things I make in it this year. So far, I’ve made Boba Tea, Navy Beans, and (in the fridge right now,) I have a cheesecake chilling for me. Paloma also used the machine to make lemon curd for the cheesecake. (Have you ever made lemon curd on the stove? You have to stir it for about 30-45 minutes without stopping. In the instant pot, you just blend everything up, stick it in a jar in the pot, and hit go.)
Morning Time:
I have to say that sitting at the table with my whole family is a grounding experience for me. Not just eating, because honestly meals can be hectic a lot of times. But that slow way of sitting, listening to scripture or read-alouds, watching the kids draw or make things while they listen, doodling in my journal… When we aren’t doing this, I sorely miss it. It makes me feel anchored to these people that I love.
My mind and body are really slowing down, and I don’t have a lot of extra anything right now. My personal goals right now do not go far beyond establishing a routine and nourishing my family. Creatively, I feel all my energy is being sucked right down into my belly. This always happens. I know that creative energy will come back in a few months, and I will be so happy to feel it again. In the meantime, I am trying to find (and finding) real joy in the simple pleasures of being a wife and mother. I was snuggling with my sweet 2-year-old baby boy last night, watching him sleep, thinking how blessed I am to get to live with a baby. It is so sweet to be loved with such a tender, fierce, gentle, innocent, and trusting love. And to breathe in a baby is a pleasure that is only for a season. I was thinking about how much having older children has made a difference in the way I am able to enjoy these babies. They help me so much, and I am also just more aware that they will continue to grow and change, day by day. I want to soak up every minute of every season. It is good to go slow and remember this.
Sending love, and hopes for good routines and rhythms in your life no matter what speed you are moving. Thank you so much for being here and for reading these weekly letters. It means so much to me.
Mackenzie
More thoughts on motherhood and faith from last year’s substack letters: