Things I Love, August Edition
homeschool reboot, social media limits, classics, and kids who make food
I always feel a little bit lost in the first trimester fog—my brain slows down from a flowy river to the drip, drip, drip of a leaky faucet. It feels odd and wrong to not like tea and coffee and to have so much time to rest in a room by myself with literally no thoughts in my head. My journals are filling in slow-motion, and ideas trickle in like cold molasses. I have been dealing with pretty consistent morning sickness from around 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. most days like it’s my full-time job. I made a joke about the story of Swan Lake where every day the princess is turned into a swan and she doesn’t turn back into a princess until the evening. That’s me. A change comes over me in the late afternoon, and I start to feel alive and well, human even, hungry, happy, full of life again. I have a mild case of it all, for which I am extremely grateful, because life goes on with a houseful of people to feed and love and nourish. I’m thankful for my husband and children who are giving me heaps of grace, letting me disappear for a couple of hours when I need to sleep, and taking on many of the responsibilities that normally fall to me. When I feel lost in the fog, longing for my old energy, my good ideas, the words that bubble up inside and around me, I remember that this is a season I have lived through many times. And even though right now all of my creative energy is tied up, getting sucked straight down into my growing belly, I know it will come back around to me in a few weeks.
And yet, there have been so many beautiful experiences in the last month. I like to make these Things I Love posts to recommend to you things that I am enjoying, as well as to keep a record for myself so I can look back and remember the things that are inspiring me, season by season.
So here we go…
Things I Love, August Edition:
To Kill a Mockingbird: I know I had to have read this book at some point in high school, and I am positive that I watched the movie with Gregory Peck. (His face remains the face of Atticus for me as I read the story, even though all of the other characters are from my imagination. And now that I think about it, I believe that I imagined most of the book in black and white.) But I was moved deeply by this book on prejudice and on the value of human life, of the secret struggles of all people, the two sides to every story. I was quietly shaken by this classic book.
Loving Vincent: I recently rewatched the striking film, Loving Vincent, the story of the life and death of Vincent Van Gogh. I don’t know that I have ever seen a more beautiful film. The movie is made from over 65,000 still shots of oil paintings, painted in the style of Van Gogh, giving the impression that you are watching his masterpieces come to life. The animation is unbelievable. Even though the film is centered around the heavy question of what caused him to commit suicide, it brings to light the beauty and tenderness of his artistic vision and truly celebrates his life and work.
Deleting Social Media from My Phone: This week, Randy and I decided to delete social media from our phones. I can’t tell you what difference this is making in my life. I feel that I have a fairly healthy relationship with facebook and instagram, keeping it mainly to post my writing, which I fling out into to the world in hopes that someone will find some comfort in it. I do enjoy the genuine back-and-forth that I have with friends, but I have found that I just spend too much time checking in. And I am also in a season of limited time, so I want to make the most of it. Part of it also boils down to this: I want to take captive my thoughts and be in control of what I choose to put into my mind. Just like I wouldn’t choose to read a book that I knew was trash or watch a movie that I knew would leave me feeling depressed, so I prefer to not allow my mind to be saturated with information, posts, articles, videos, and ads that are not adding to the peace of my life. I am prayerfully looking for a way forward, because I value the ability to (however haphazardly) share what I feel God is putting on my heart. But there is also a lot there that weighs heavily upon me, so I am trying to put some healthy boundaries to my social media use. I have decided to use my laptop for social media, which makes it less accessible to me on a minute-by-minute basis. For now, my plan is to check in weekly and catch up on any comments or posts I need to address, and then put it away for the rest of the week. This has been incredibly freeing, and I can’t tell you what a blessing it has been to make this change with my husband. It feels a little bit like coming out of a stupor. I have been inspired by Cal Newport’s book, Digital Minimalism, as well as Tsh Oxenreider’s podcast episode where she talks about leaving instagram.
Getting Fired Up About Staying Home for School: There are times when homeschooling looms over me and I wonder what in the world I am doing. Especially in seasons like this where I am tired. It usually takes some conversations with dear, lifelong friends who are on this same journey to remind me that I actually love doing this, and that even though the progress I see day by day is so slow and sometimes imperceptible, we are doing amazing things and our children’s lives are being shaped by the everydayness of learning and growing together as individuals and as a family. I bought a new planner, I have been making lists, praying for vision, shaking things down to the essential needs of each child for this season. God is sparking a fire in me for a new season of a bit more structured learning. We tend to do this—I get really involved for a few weeks, then I back off for a season of more child-directed learning, and then we cycle back. I think this is a good way for creative people to homeschool. Too much structure chokes the life out of me. But no routine makes me feel like I am being tossed about on the open seas. I am always looking for a balance here. I have loved listening to Melissa Wiley describe a similar way of homeschooling that she calls Tidal Schooling.
Podcasts: My current favorite podcasts are 1000 Hours Outside, Read Aloud Revival, and At Home With Sally. All of these get me inspired as a mother, a home educator, and a woman who is always wanting to learn and grow.
Kids Who Make Food: As I type this, I can smell burgers coming from the kitchen. My son, Kells, asked me what we were having for lunch and I had no idea. He said he would make burgers. The other day, Paloma asked me if I would teach her how to make bagels. I said of course I would. And she did it right there on the spot. Now she knows how to make my favorite Gluten Free Bagels 100% from scratch, starting with grinding the rice into flour. And she likes to do it! This blows my mind. In this season of feeling sick and really not wanting to deal with food, this has been a huge blessing that some of my children like to cook, and many of them know how.
I sense the love of God in these details. I am grateful for the beautiful things he has put in my life. Walks to town with Randy, hearing my children play the piano, watching them play board games with their friends, seeing them nestled into the corner of the couch reading a good book, watching Randy write new songs, conversations with friends, moving a pen across the blank page. Life is sweet. I am glad to be here.
Sending love to all of you. Thank you for allowing me to slip into your inbox and share a few words each week. It means so much to me that you are still reading…
Mackenzie
From the Family Archive:
Randy made me laugh all morning, drawing this picture last week. This is an unrehearsed recording of his new song, What a Day (the country version), played with two friends who were visiting for the afternoon. I hope you like it.
Making/Doing:
Paloma has been working on her precious little handmade dollies. They are like her drawings come to life. They make me happy.
Throughout the day, Rosie steals any time she can at the piano. She is working on polishing up some of her original songs to record in the months ahead.
From the Podcast:
When Randy and I first started homeschooling, it was because we wanted the flexibility of having our children with us. We imagined traveling, playing music, and bringing our children along… Life shifted as we had more children and we began to restructure our life within the comfort of home. As our children and family size have grown (we now have eight children ages 2 to 15), so has our philosophy of education. I have tried lots of programs and ideas, read lots of books, and immersed myself into many different homeschool methods. If you asked a dozen home educators to tell you about their week, you would get a dozen different answers. That is the beauty of learning at home. It has shown me, like nothing else, that there is not one prefabricated structure that is best for all families. Truly, as I have prayed through the vision of homeschooling my children, season by season, I have looked out on a vast landscape of possibility. In this episode, I am sharing what our week as a homeschooling family looks like. A year from now, I am sure we will have new routines! But today, I welcome you to sit down with me over a cup of coffee for a glimpse into our current family rhythms of life and learning.
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Ahh I just listened to Tsh's episode recapping her 100-Mile Radius Experiment from a little while back -- but that episode you linked on leaving Instagram was so great from what I remember (I mean, you can't go wrong). Sarah Mackenzie's Read Aloud Family book was super helpful (probably a distillation of her podcast themes, though I've not gotten into it)!