Hemmed In
And I like it that way
The baby is sleeping now. She spent several minutes flailing and crying herself red in the face, but now she is wrapped snugly in her little blanket, hands tucked up against her body, resting in her daddy’s arms. She is unable to move, and she likes it that way. She knows she isn’t going to fall. She knows she is held. Once she feels secure, she calms and goes to sleep.
I feel like a child myself, though I am 44 years old and have ten children of my own. At times I feel panic rising, my face reddening, and a cry of desperation rising up out of my soul. This unsafe world, the questions without answers, the not-knowing, the difficult choices, the things that have happened, the things that can happen… My arms are flailing. I feel like I may fall.
This morning, looking at the face of this little baby, God reminds me again of my favorite Psalm.
“Oh Lord, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand on me.” (Psalm 139:1-5 ESV)
Oh God, you hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand on me.
My sweet, sleeping baby is the illustration of this scripture. Seeing her resting in her father’s arms is a living metaphor.
Because when I look back over my life, over and over, I sense this: I am held. I am held. I am held. The love of God holds. It holds me. It holds the world together. It holds this present moment, it holds the past and future. His love covers every question. It goes before and behind. Before the answer is given, in the waiting space, after the answer comes. The love of God is wrapped around me like a swaddling blanket. I can’t get out of it, and I like it that way. I am safe. I am held. I cannot fall.
I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; For You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8 NKJV
Dear friends,
Sending this little thought in the hope that you may sense the love of God holding you today.
With love,
Mackenzie
From the Family Archive:
Here are excerpts from Psalm 139, set to music by Randy. I love this song.